Last updated on June 20, 2006 .

Quotes out of context, from Barcelona

Joey as Dionysus, to Zeus "I HATE YOU DAD!!"

"We got any Goddess-bombs?"
*The Prince throws open her cloak. The conclave looks dumbfounded.
Finally Ignacio speaks up with*
"Yeah, those are some of the biggest Goddess bombs I've ever seen."

ST says--
"Ok, the door is about to be broken down by monks and nuns. What you
gonna do?"
"I'm gonna strip nekkid."
*the ST stares at the PC for a sec*
"When they come in, I grab the nearest cross off the wall and hide my
nekkid-ness behind it, all with a sheepish grin."
(The really sad part about this one is it --worked--. It's hard, even for monks and nuns, to
yell when they're laughing.)

The Sheriff--
"Do I see flames in the distance?"
"Yes."
"Are they red or blue-green?"
"They're red."
"AELFLAED!!!"
(Aelflaed being our resident Malkavian psycho fire-bug)

ST says--
"So what's your action?"
"I'm going to leap over his head and deliver a kick to his jaw in true
Jackie Chan style."
"You are." *skeptical look*
"Yeah. I've invented a new sport and a new stat to bid. I'll call it
Gangrel Olympics."

Aelflad says--
"Can we offer you...hospitality of some of the fine ladies of our
establishment?"
*NPC Van Helsing looks around* "No, I'm much too busy with my studies
to....well, do you have any little boys? Wait, there's one!"
*the Lasombra childe scowls and stomps off. Aelflad is at a loss for
ANYthing to say*

Our introduction to the various wonders of True Faith---
Thadius glares at the demented Tzimisce thingie, pulls out his cross,
and says "Fear God." After grumbling and testing and all that
funnery, someone says as the Tzimisce runs away:
"He WHIPPED out his God and laid the smack down on yo' defiled
ass!"

*the Laibon, who does not a-speaka a good e-spanish, talking*
"He called it a what?"
"A homunculus, I think."
"A homo...unc...sounds like monkey...did he say homo-monkey?"

The Prince, speaking to her group before yet another adventure--
"Ok, we've got the horses. Thadius, you riding?"
*Thadius shakes his head*
"Why not?"
"I can't get into the saddle."
*the conclave is silent for a moment, before erupting into OOC laughter*

A short time later, same scene, Kosen (Thadius' player) tries to explain to the ST
why Thadius can't get into the saddle.
"I can't get into the saddle because I'm 'lame', but I have Potence and a long
black stick, so I'll figure out something."

As the Gangrel with shapeshifting abilities discover the uses of buckets
carried in owl claws.
"Death from above!"

*the ST, wiping tears of laughter*
"I've got the Gangrel epitaph from this game, want to hear it?------CHAAAAAARGE!"

"I'm going to KILL you, ass."
"You and what army?"
A thumb is jerked behind him.
"Me and about, oh, 200 or so humans. Royal Guard, Town Guard, the Inquisition and..."

"So, why are we here again?"
"We're going to negotiate with the Garou."
"We're in the forest, surrounded by Garou already, during the full moon when the
Get-a-Fenris like to get pumped up and goofy, and we're going to --negotiate--
with them?!"
"That's the plan."
"We are SO dead."

"I didn't think dropping an anvil on his head would KILL him!"

And someone's reaction to the above quote:
"Was it Darius?"
The ST blinks, laughs, and says, "Well, yes."

In the midst of a huge combat involving like 20 people, NPC's, a powerful relic
and other things, there's dead silence after a player asks a stupid
question. Everyone holds their collective breath as the ST takes a deep breath,
and says:
"Okay, who brought the ST chocolate. I KNOW --someone-- did!"

"So whats' your action?"
"I'm going to kill them all. Do I need to test for that or something?"

After a particularly long and involved ST-ing night:
"Okay, the Merit Storyteller-Is-God is now a NINE point merit!"

As people are watching the vampires go nuts:
"The Prince told the Kiasyd to bring refreshments, didn't she. Damnit!"

"Will you STOP it?! You're ruining my brilliant f%cking plan!"

"Now here's what ya'll have to do--"
"Did he just seriously say 'yall'?"
*And there's dead silence, as the Brujah speaks up with--*
"Yeah, I'm from southern France!"

"So, what's your action?"
"I'm going to possess a whale." She looks around. "What! I've got
Animalism."